#Beartales

You'd think think after... er.... 26 years of marriage? I would have learned never, ever get into a conversation with The Bear about weight loss.

Bear's just been for a regular medical, and came bouncing in full of beans because she's lost 4 lb in weight, and her blood pressure was 119/60. Spot on.

Since she now knew her weight according the doctors scales, she brought the scales from the bathroom down and weighed herself again on those. We had suspected ours 'weighed over'. Correct, by 2 lbs.

Pleased as punch, she insisted I weighed myself - I've been dieting for weeks - and I'd lost 16 lbs english - 1 stone 2 lbs in the same period she'd lost 4lb.

It went downhill from there. This led to a discussion about Body Mass Index. I'm 10 years older than The Bear, and exactly a foot taller. My BMI is 26.2 at present. Bear's is 32.6.

It works like this.....

• Underweight = <18.5
• Normal weight = 18.5–24.9
• Overweight = 25–29.9
• Obesity = BMI of 30 or greater

So she says, "Cool, I only need to lose a couple of points down to about 30".

I guess if you've read my blogs you've realised I have a compulsive logical streak. Which can be good?

Any reasonable person would have smiled and said "Yes'm" and found an excuse to be busy. Oh, no. Not me. I was reminded what Bears REALLY do in the woods. Fell Giant Redwoods with their teeth.

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To be fair, as my GP explained to me awhile back, BMI is being phased out in the UK. It led to inequalities, such as Firemen, Policemen, Rugby players and weight training athletes being suspended from their work and ordered to lose weight because they were classed by BMI as overweight.

It's being replaced by a method that measures limb, tummy and height measurements, tum being the important one. Called Body Fat Measurement (BFM) it finds out how much of your body is fat.

A Rugby player can have a BMI of 35 (see table above) but have a healthy BFM of 15-18% or less.

Bear hasn't been checked for that. Mine is 22%. Way to go yet :)

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Blabbering idiot that I am, I said something nice. I said, "Bear if I wanted to marry some skinny little thing, I would have done? Wouldn't I? I married a Bear with all the right bumps in the right places?"

"Bear?"

"What? What?"

What?

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Bear is complaining I don't publish #Beartales on Twitter any more. (@wheelieslug) She says it was really funny. So, looking at her carefully over my reading glasses, I said "Oh, beloved, may your knicker drawer never be infested by the fleas of a thousand camels, you do know that #Beartales is you, don't you?"

"Yes dear" she replied, looking at me as though I was somewhat dim. "But I like it". I think

I'll have to have a lie down......