Hope this helps.

Had a couple of influenza injections - the yearly 'normal batch 'flu jab, and the dreaded H1N1 - one in either arm :)

Oddly, my Bear, who because she just happens to be married to me, has had the normal one, but not the H1N1. Apparently, their very strict who they give it to.

How did it go? Well I'd heard a few stories that the H1N1 had been an unpleasant experience for some people, but a little close questioning (I'm good at that) unravelled that most of the neigh-sayers refuse inoculations anyway.

There's a mistaken belief that an inoculation is that you "get a little to save a lot". Probably based on the historic beginnings some 300 years ago when indeed, tiny amounts of live virus where used on unsuspecting victims. Who had a minor version of a similar or same illness, and survived where they wouldn't have before.

Time has moved on. A lot.

The body produces antibodies to viri. You probably catch one virus or another often. Antibodies are produced to fit that virus, and destroy it.

A virus consists of little more than a protein coat containing a little DNA. It, if you like, burrows into human cells, and uses some of the DNA in there to reproduce itself by the million. Time, after time. This damages the cell, and either kills it or screws it up silly. This is why people who have underlying health problems are most at risk.

Your body just doesn't sit there and take it. It produces designer antibodies that fight back, scraps to repair the damage, and uses lots of other devices to defeat the invader, like increasing those antibodies tremendously, raising you temperature, throwing all sorts of other defences against it. That's what 'unwell' is. Fighting the good fight. Most of the time, you won't even know you're under attack.

It would be just plain STUPID to inject live viri, ne'er mind illegal, into vulnerable people. It's called murder nowadays.

I'll not get into here how it works. But antibodies have a very basic purpose, and that is to recognise that protein coat I mentioned, and destroy it. No protein, dead 'flu.

The companies who produce a vaccine multiply the virus, kill the DNA, while maintaining the bits that antibodies recognise. That is stored in a preservative solution that keeps the contents fresh.

So why do some people feel unwell for a couple of days after injections? A tiny percentage don't get on with the preservative. Another tiny percentage have already caught H1Ni or another of the four or five variations of flu before injection. Often, it's just a good old fashioned cold. Has to be said that some people react badly to being a bit 'off colour' anyway (man flu?)

But the main reason is that The Body has a host of other defences that it throws at anything it perceives, rather unintelligently, as a thread, a lot that that can make a person feel unwell for a couple of days. And again, it's all down to a persons personal reaction to feeling off-colour.

How did it affect me? Well, they injected me in my right arm with 'normal multi-flu'. I don't have much feeling there anyways. The left was H1N1. That's been sore for 48 hours, slacking off gradually. I was shattered for 48, but I'm not used to going out much anyways. Slept for 8 hours, and I'm a 4 hours a night fella normally. Bear says I was hot and restless.

Wish I'd suggested the the right arm for H1N1:)

Guess it's no secret I like to cook. Or that I like the odd (very odd, strong, occasional ) lager either. Since I can't get out much -which is bloomin' annoying, cooking is my real vice. Though not eating, funnily enough. The combination of cooking and and a can? - inspiration, thats what :)

If you're an occasional reader, you'll know that I have a fascination with seasonal pickles, and Autumn/Winter/Christmas is my favourite time of year. Wheelie Weather. Seriously.

I've been inundated with requests for my Piccalilli this year as Christmas presents. It goes as 'Wheelielilly' I'm not sure I can keep up with demand.

Here's the odd thing. Some like the sauce bit. Others like it with the veg. Some ask me to 'wizzywig' it a bit to keep any chunks tiny.

I do various chutneys too, but I'm not going to give those recipes away :)

Piccalilli is so easy to make yourself - the basic recipe is below, but I have my little exra's. Warning. It pongs when you cook it - open a window, and leave it in a cool dark place for um, at least a month :)

700ml Malt vinegar. GOT to be malt.
2 tbsp Coriander seeds/1 tbsp ground (supermarket) Coriander, or if your lucky, 4 tbsp fresh.
500g Cauliflower, broken into 3cm florets
2 Onions, peeled and chopped.

Cheat here. Sure, add the onions as above. You might like also add silver skin onions bought from the supermarket. A little of the fluid from the jar added to the final recipe will cool as a preservative.

3 tbsp English mustard powder - though 2 tbsp ground mustard seed is better for texture.
3 tbsp Plain flour
1 tbsp Turmeric
2 tsp Ground ginger - Ah, go with your instinct on this. Try 3/4 inch of grated fresh instead . Hard work tho'
150ml Cider vinegar (ooh yes - white wine vinegar is good too)
100 grams/4 oz anything you want. Traditionally, french beans. Try 4 oz of mixed red and yellow peppers
½ Cucumber, quartered lengthways and cut into 1cm slices. Personally, I prefer gherkins.
2 Garlic cloves, mashed. beat the heck out of them. But don't skip it.
200g Granulated or muscavada sugar
Method

1. Place the malt vinegar and coriander seeds in a large preserving pan and bring to a boil. Add the cauliflower and onion and simmer for 5 minutes until slightly softened but still crunchy. Meanwhile, put the mustard, flour, turmeric and ginger in a small bowl and gradually whisk in the cider vinegar until smooth. Add the remaining vegetables, garlic and sugar to the pan and stir over the heat for 2–3 minutes until the sugar has dissolved. Drain over a large bowl to collect the vinegar.

2. Put the mustard mixture in the pan and bring to the boil. Gradually add the drained malt vinegar and simmer for 10 minutes, until thick enough to coat the back of the spoon. Add the drained vegetables and take off the heat. Spoon into sterilised jars – if they’re not kilner jars, cover them with plastic discs and elastic bands rather than metal lids, which can sometimes react with the vinegar.

Stick it in a cupboard for a month - eat with home made bread - no compromise.

Grumpy warning

Mobile (cell) phones - I hate 'em. Got one tho'.

Does anyone know ANYONE over the age of fourteen who can text with one hand? Anyone over that age who can understand txt spk plz? I know I can't. Note - stroke survivor?

How about text 'receipts' - whats all that about ? You end up in those really gormless phone conversations 5 minutes after you receive a text... Mobile rings. So I have to wobble from my Wheels across the living room to the mantle. Posh translation, across the lounge to the hearth.

"Why didn't you reply to my text?"
Me:- "Eh?"
"I know you got it"
Me:- "Uhuh?"
"I had my 'receipts' turned on....."
Me:- "Your phoning because?"
"You didn't reply and my 'receipt' said you got it. You could have least have texted OK "

Blimey, talk about illogical, captain. Didn't reply because I didn't want to. So there. And like heck was I going to pay 12 pence to say 'ok'. Insecurity rules k.o.

I'm pay as I go. For some odd reason known as pay as you go. No it isn't. I pay if I phone.

What are these Special Offers texts I keep getting from my provider? Every Friday I get a text.

"If you pay another £5/£10" it claims, "you can have free texts for the weekend"

Really? Lets do the maths here. My mobile provider charges me 12 pence per text. Thats 41.6 texts for £5 over two days. Thats 'free'? Why would I wanna text 41 times anyway - and (aha!) what happens to that 0.6 texts? . Tain't Free, is it. Pah.

And, finally. Do you ever get calls on your mobile like "Where are you?" Duh. My standard answer is "How did you know I was here......?"

___________________

At long last, I've retired from from ghost-writing sermons.

Don't look so surprised at the thought that a sermon might be ghost-written.

Churches run by committee, much like politics. It's been a long time since any religion had truly independent preachers, and those preachers that are truly independent have such a heavy case load they sometimes sub-contract.

I'm talking Christian preachers/leaders here, of various denominations. As time has gone on, I've found keeping track of the various internal politics, doctrines and practices (not to be confused with, but similar to secular politics) such hard work I've decided I've had enough. It increasingly became irrelevant to me, and it's the sort of writing that if you can't inject some passion into, you shouldn't be doing it, even if your writing is negotiated. So, for me, it's the end of an era. I'm sad to let it go.

I would, even if you have no religious convictions, urge that you respect those church workers that do. Ninety-nine percent of the work they do is unsung, unrewarded, and often at the expense of their health, their home life and their freedom, and get this - even so far as their churches know. They are societies unsung hero's. Bless 'em.

Ooch !

Say Hi to Daz the Man on my followers. I like Daz. What you see is what you get, and I like Daz because of. Which is crap grammar, but what the heck. Please visit his blog and encourage him to blog more often - he lives in interesting times. And can that guy sing. Heckuva voice. Advert over :)

Today somebody brassed me off. But hey, nothing happens to those that don't do anything.

Which is even worse grammar :)

_________________

Had to scrub a blog I'd run for some years because some peeps complained that by using moderation I was restricting their freedom of speech. Basically they were pushing their own religious agenda.

I'm an easy going, chilled out kinda chap, and pretty open to much. But when I find myself spending more than hour a day every day moderating comments from a combination of pro-faith, anti-faith, and so-called free-speechers (they wanna do what they wanna do but jump on anyone who doesn't do what THEY wanna do) ie. neither side wanted to accept moderation.

I thought, well blow this. More useful things to do with my time ;) I am, indeed, as someone commented, "a god in my own little world". No platform, no problem. Simple. It's enough to make you twitter..........

_________________

Errr....

Hope everyone realises the last post was tongue-in-cheek.... (cheesy grin!)

You won't find that I post much about politics here, but the present row in the press about cannabis has irritated the heck.

A quick summery. The UK govs chief advisor has been asked to resign, because he said that 'ecstasy', cannabis and LSD are less harmful than alcohol or cigarettes. Mr David Nutt wanted a classification by harm approach to substance abuse - fair enough.

But, and quite rightly, the chap is a scientist, and a good one. So he deals with the evidence he discovers and gets hold of and analysis in a sterile environment. So the evidence that leads to his conclusions is empirical, and expresses it mathematically. It has to be, it's the nature of the job.

But like most scientists, he misses the point. People aren't data points. They can't be assessed statistically, because there are other factors that don't on the surface, seem to directly apply in a an assessment of harm. It'd make life more complicated, and more importantly, more expensive, and clinical studies are driven by cost grants.

I'd argue, that his arguments ignore the supply chain. The guys that supply LSD, Cannabis, illegal alcohol and cigs share a common trait, and that is they are violent, ruthless, businessmen. They'll do what they have to do to make money, and that money is reinvested to make more money, no matter what it takes. Prostitution, slavery, illegal substances, vat fraud.

If you smoke cannabis or skunk, they may well import 50-100% pure substances, but by the time they hit their target audience, it being diluted by tobacco, garden weeds and brick dust. They'll be lucky if they get 1% purity.

Max Profit doesn't give a monkeys bum about the human cost and debris in the pursuit of profit, and whatever government or it's advisor expect of them, even if you legalise it, whatever 'it' may be, there's always going to be an underground trade in cheap products for quick profit for the supplier.

Like Wot She Said

"Y'can tell a Yorkshireman, but y'can't tell him much"

I know, it's a golden oldie. Which figures, considering it came from 'Er Indoors, aka The Bear.

She's quite right of course. Y'can't. Not this Yorkshireman. She's only allowed to say so because she comes from a village closer to Barnsley. Barnsley, or Baaarnsley as she calls it, everyone knows, is only honorary Yorkshire, due some unusual diplomatic cross border relations some hundreds of years ago between their good selves and Sheffield. Quite what those relations were have been lost in the mists of time.

All I can find out on Google is that it was some considerable time before t'internet was invented, and therefore the information is not reliably recorded. I have a sneaking suspicion it was my relations fault.

Sheffield, as we all know, is the true Yorkshire. It is also said that "If tha does owt f'nowt, tha does it for thisen, and never for minimum wage". It must have been a helluva favour.

Note - Edited because The Bear threatened to take me and my wheels to the top of a hill and let go. Wow, what a woman :) Also added Barnsley, Baarnsley, and Yorkshireman to my browsers dictionary. So now it's true.

________

Posted (as a reply, I should add) something light hearted about sex and disability on The Stroke Association forum, Talk Stroke. I was very cautious and discreet. At the end of a list of posts by carers basically saying "no chance buster, after looking after him/her, I'm too knackered". My post, as was theirs, wiped out by The SA. Three times, which kinda sums it all up. Story of my life. Funny :) Stroke survivors have normal lives don't'cha'know :)

Assuming everyone else is like anyone else I guess. Which, I doubt. In fact, heck I hope not.

What is 'normal'?

Bliss.

Ok, not stroke related. Again. But as Terry Pratchett (bless 'is cotton socks) says in one of his books - "bugger it, bugger it, bugger'em". If you get the chance, read his stuff. Highly recommended, if you want a chuckle muscle transplant.

Uh, oh, got a journalist added (added? is there such a word?) as a follower. Quite a wonderfully scatty one too :) Now I'm in trouble..... ~chuckle~ !

Ahum. Anyways.....

This, for me, is the most satisfying time of the year.

Bottling, pickling, preserving, and most of the ingredients free. The local fields are bursting with blackberries, and seasonal fruit, such as apples, pears and plums are going to find themselves turned into jams and chutneys. There's something very rewarding about picking it yourself and seeing the finished product. Other than that, I insist 'Er Indoors looks for 'buy it quick before we chuck it' fruit and veg offers at the supermarket. Three cheers for my grandparents who lived through the war years.

I've been doing this for thirty years, and being one always conscious to watch the pennies, and hating waste - heck, even cauliflower leaves get turned into a creamy, peppery soup with garlic and croutons - I find it very satisfying. Oh, already said that.

Until about three years ago I only made it for the home, and since I use seasonal stuff, found October through to Christmas was my busy season. With All Hallows, Bonfire and Christmas in quick succession, Home Made's are our little bit of luxury. Besides it's kinda nice, particularly in winter, to taste a self made jam and remember the freshness of the fruit from summer.

Don't let the recipes for jams on the net fool you. Sure, you can buy fancy jars. Yup, there's them there fancy 'waxed' disks, jam thermometers and expensive preserving sugars, pectin powders and liquids. I've even discovered you can buy breadmakers with a 'Jam' function. These things all work too. You'll save a lot though using a well washed jar scrounged from a neighbour, kept hot. You don't need a jam thermometer. A spoonful of jam on a cold plate - when it's ready it it will set and wrinkle if pushed with a finger. You don't need pectin either - the juice of a lemon and lemon rind or a little sour apple do the job. Need a disc for the top?
A cup a pencil and a roll of greaseproof paper do the same job. And use ordinary sugar. Nothing fancy - equal parts sugar to fruit. Honey is a great bactericide, so substitute honey for sugar or add a spoonful to the mix.

But autumn and winter are pickles and chutneys. Unlike jams, they last forever. Well, mine do, so there's not really such a thing as an excess, assuming it doesn't get eaten :)

About three years ago, as an experiment, I gave (and posted!) relatives and friends jars of home made piccalilli and sweet chilli sauce for Christmas. Oh, my. Guess who's having to make extra piccalilli today so it's well matured for December ? The demand for Wheelielilli is phenomenal.

I won't bother posting a recipe. Google it. It's so simple. A few tips though. Add a few spoonful's of chopped red, yellow and green peppers to each jar. They add a splash of colour., and they add to any sweetness.

Try Malt Vinegar. It'll give a darker sauce, but a gorgeous flavour. Likewise if you use a dark cane sugar.

If you can't get (or don't want to pay for) shallots don't feel guilty about it. Chopped spring onion, fairly big pieces, added raw to the mix before you pour the mustard/vinegar sauce on
works well, as does cheap, own-brand supermarket silver skin onions :)

A good Piccalilli should have a bit of crunch, and that's definitely true when it comes to the Cauliflower. I have my own recipe, but those on the web invariably say "boil in the sauce for 10-15 minutes" DON'T DO IT !! Instead, take your time with the cauliflower. Sit in the kitchen, put the radio on, and using a small knife work your way through the beastie cut the florets at an even size. Try and keep the stems short, but don't discard them. Put them aside. Afterwards, chop the stems into tiny pieces, and add them to your bowl.

That will take awhile. While your doing that, put a big pan - bigger than you need - on the stove with lots of water and a spoonful of sea salt, and bring it to a rapid boil. When you've finished, throw it in the pan. That'll cool it, but wait for it to come back to the boil, and when it begins to boil, time it for three (3) mins. Immediately sieve it into the sink and run it under the cold tap to stop it cooking. Allow to drain, then use as per the recipe. Voila, cooked but crunchy cauli.


Phew. Give me a little while and I'll post a quick and simple recipe for a sweet Chilli sauce/dip/preserve, and some tips on how to use it as an unusual preserve.

By the way, 'Er indoors went to my me some camouflage trousers t'other day. Couldn't find 'em. Went to the doctors, said I'd got back pain. He said it's my age. I said, "I want a second opinion." He said "You're ugly". I bought some HP sauce the other day. It's costing me 6p a month for the next 2 years.

And finally.... I went to the doctors the other day and I said, 'have you got anything for wind', so he gave me a kite.... ahum.